I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
Marge, you're as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda.
What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.
Life's but short. You might as well be amusing.
Itís a terrible thing to appear on television Ė because people think you actually know what youíre talking about!
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
Ill put off readingLolitafor six more years until she turns 18.
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
I have nothing but respect for you - and not much of that.
Sex is an emotion in motion.
[Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
Imagine being killed by a bow and arrow. That would suck, an arrow killed you? They would never solve the crime. 'Look at that dead guy. Let's go that way.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde.
I will not join any club who will take me as a member
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.