The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.
Iíve been bitten by a python. It wasnít a very big oneÖ
If I play a stupid girl and ask a stupid question, I've got to follow it through, what am I supposed to do, look intelligent?
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.
Cynicism is humour in ill health.
Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.
I don't pray really, because I don't want to bore God.
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, but a filmmaker needs an army.
Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.
Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them.