I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
I've heard that hard work never killed anyone, but I say why take the chance?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.
If you tell people you talk to God, they'll think you're religious, but if you say God talks to you, it's ten to one they'll think you're crazy.
If any of you cry at my funeral, I'll never speak to you again.
There's only one rule you need to remember: laugh at everything and forget everybody else! It sound egotistical, but it's actually the only cure for those suffering from self-pity
There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
I dont know where I am going, but I am on my way.
I can't do the same thing every night, the same gestures... it's like putting on dirty panties every day.
Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they're on the same side.
I'm single because I was born that way.
If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does, and that is his.
Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.
A sense of humour is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.
If you are flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is.