I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
There are some people that you cannot change, you must either swallow them whole or leave them alone.
I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.
If any of you cry at my funeral, I'll never speak to you again.
It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing.
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
I have nothing to declare except my genius.
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde.
[Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, but a filmmaker needs an army.
You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?