I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.
It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age.
I don't pray really, because I don't want to bore God.
Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
I love great music and art, but I think 'cubist' songs and paintings are hideous.
To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks.
You know that Pepperidge Farm bread, that stuff is fancy. That stuff is wrapped twice. You open it, and then still ain't open. That's why I don't buy it, I don't need another step between me and toast.
If your dog is going to suffer from diarrhea, it will happen between the time the carpet is cleaned for the holidays and the last holiday get-together.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
You'll never find a rainbow if you're looking down
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.
I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant.
You live but once; you might as well be amusing.
An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is.
I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'