An intellectual is a man who doesn't know how to park a bike.

The true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person want to do it.

Women have the right to work wherever they want, as long as they have the dinner ready when you get home.

Give up trying to make me give up

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.

After all, science is essentially international, and it is only through lack of the historical sense that national qualities have been attributed to it.

The last of human freedoms - the ability to chose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances.

Not simply one of the virtues but the form of every virtue at the testing point, which means at the point of highest reality.

Surrealism is destructive, but it destroys only what it considers to be shackles limiting our vision.

There's no such thing as perfect writing, just like there's no such thing as perfect despair.

Many have had their greatness made for them by their enemies.

There is not such a cradle of democracy upon the earth as the Free Public Library, this republic of letters, where neither rank, office, nor wealth receives the slightest consideration.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live.

When one door is closed, don't you know that many more are open

No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.

Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect-and I don't live to be-but before you start pointing fingers... make sure your hands are clean!

Could be worse . . . I could be Sting.