Women are made to be loved not understood.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask whats for lunch.
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.
I used to think anyone doing anything weird was weird. Now I know that it is the people that call others weird that are weird.
My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
If you are flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
I'm sorry this letter is so long, I didn't have time to make it shorter.
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
I dont know where I am going, but I am on my way.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.