Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.
A writer needs a pen, an artist needs a brush, but a filmmaker needs an army.
Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept.
If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.
I had a dream that I was awake and I woke up to find myself asleep.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
There are only two types of women: goddesses and doormats.
I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.
I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask whats for lunch.
That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
If your dog is going to suffer from diarrhea, it will happen between the time the carpet is cleaned for the holidays and the last holiday get-together.
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.