He has a brilliant mind until he makes it up.
Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.
You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.
To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks.
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
Nothing is permanent in this wicked world, not even our troubles.
If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her.
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does, and that is his.
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask whats for lunch.
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
I live in a neighbourhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.
It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen.
I do this real moron thing, it's called thinking, and I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.