I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didnt know.
Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet.
He could not see a belt without hitting below it.
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
The truly free man is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.
My God. We've had cloning in the South for years. It's called cousins.
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree.
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.
I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does, and that is his.
I will not join any club who will take me as a member
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.