If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Men are as faithful as their options.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didnt know.
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.
I live in a neighbourhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.
Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get.
I got a king-sized bed. I don't know any kings, but if one came over, I guess he'd be comfortable.
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.
No good deed goes unpunished.
It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age.
Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.
I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.