It is better to be alone than in bad company.
Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
If you tell people you talk to God, they'll think you're religious, but if you say God talks to you, it's ten to one they'll think you're crazy.
One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside.
I never travel without my diary. One must always have something sensational to read on the train.
You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.
If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde.
My God. We've had cloning in the South for years. It's called cousins.
Life's but short. You might as well be amusing.
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
A smile is the best way to get away with trouble even if it's a fake one.
When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.