Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.
Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
A smile is the best way to get away with trouble even if it's a fake one.
I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments
If any of you cry at my funeral, I'll never speak to you again.
It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen.
To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks.
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.
Cut my pie into four pieces, I dont think I could eat eight.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is.
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
It costs a lot of money to look this cheap.