Well, if she was dumb enough to marry you, she'll believe anything.
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
A sense of humour is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.
Men are as faithful as their options.
I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
Never tell your problems to anyone...20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them.
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobodys perfect so I stopped practicing.
I never travel without my diary. One must always have something sensational to read on the train.
I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
Actors search for rejection. If they don't get it they reject themselves.
Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.
I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
If any of you cry at my funeral, I'll never speak to you again.
Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
Cut my pie into four pieces, I dont think I could eat eight.
What do I wear in bed? Why, Chanel No. 5, of course.
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.