Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

The idea of freedom is inspiring. But what does it mean? If you are free in a political sense but have no food, what's that? The freedom to starve?

The true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching.

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford.

I am dying from the treatment of too many physicians.

To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.

In terms of an identity, an identity reflects an individuality, by definition. And, if there is a quality present, it is recognizable and it can be named. If you can't name it, it means you don't recognize it.

The universe we observe has precisely the properties we should expect if there is, at bottom, no design, no purpose, no evil and no good, nothing but blind pitiless indifference.

I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that`s OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.

No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true.

The Internet is becoming the town square for the global village of tomorrow.

What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?

The good times of today are the sad thoughts of tomorrow.

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

Give them pleasure. The same pleasure they have when they wake up from a nightmare.

The mind that finds its way to wild places is the poet's; but the mind that never finds its way back is the lunatic's.

Patriotism is usually stronger than class hatred, and always stronger than internationalism.

There is not such a cradle of democracy upon the earth as the Free Public Library, this republic of letters, where neither rank, office, nor wealth receives the slightest consideration.

What do you despise? By this are you truly known.

Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.