A lie never lives to be old.

Anyone who attempts to generate random numbers by deterministic means is, of course, living in a state of sin.

I have often been accused of putting my foot in my mouth, but I will never put my hand in your pockets

Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday.

The death of a beautiful woman, is unquestionably the most poetical topic in the world.

Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives.

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.

Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

The two offices of memory are collection and distribution.

When you get to a certain age, there is no coming back.

Not simply one of the virtues but the form of every virtue at the testing point, which means at the point of highest reality.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Delay always breeds danger. To protract a great design is often to ruin it.

Sanity is a madness put to good uses.

You can have everything in life that you want if you just give enough other people what they want.

Comedy is acting out optimism.

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Confusion of goals and perfection of means seems, in my opinion, to characterize our age.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.