I've heard that hard work never killed anyone, but I say why take the chance?
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks.
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character!
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is.
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
If I play a stupid girl and ask a stupid question, I've got to follow it through, what am I supposed to do, look intelligent?
Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?
You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.
When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobodys perfect so I stopped practicing.
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age.
Sex is an emotion in motion.
It costs a lot of money to look this cheap.
I will not join any club who will take me as a member
I love great music and art, but I think 'cubist' songs and paintings are hideous.
A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.
When you're thirty you're old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.